Saturday, January 8, 2011

A new superhero: Radioacto-girl!

The morning after surgery, my surgeon came in to give me the play-by-play of the procedure. He told me he removed the cancerous tumor along with my thyroid. He said it looked like it was fully enveloped in the thyroid and he got it all. Got it all... yay! Before I did a cancer-free dance (ok, I was still loopy and hooked up to IV's... it was a cancer-free gesture), the surgeon dropped a bomb and ran.

"Your lymph nodes looked a little enlarged so we took samples from them to test. Enjoy your jello!"

Translation: your cancer is spreading.

Although my doctor says I am still stage 1 cancer, it is hard for me to understand. Stage 2 means that it has spread. This is true in my case. Some of the texts I've read attest to this as well. I guess there is still a lot I have to learn.

So the next leg of my journey is treatment. There is a treatment that is specific to thyroid cancer called radioactive iodine therapy. From what I gather, it is a pill I will take that will destroy any remaining thyroid tissue left in my body. It is a process by which I will have to go into isolation for 2 to 5,682 days (depending on who you talk to) so that I don't spread my radio-activeness to anyone. I have to stop breastfeeding my son, which breaks my heart to no end. Being away from my husband and kids for a few days is bad enough, let alone having to change my baby's routine like that.

In the meantime, I can't help but be scared. I have divvied up the life insurance payout Brenner will get in my mind about a hundred times. I know God will not forsake me, but there are various definitions of what that might look like. It sounds like this cancer is fairly easy to beat, as it has a 95% cure rate if it is in stage 1, but still nothing to mess with.

So I have to figure out how I am going to go radioactive and stay sane all at the same time. I have to give up the craziness of life for a few solitary days of peace and quiet. Wait a second, what am I saying? Er, was this radioactive thing a ruse for tired mamas who wouldn't mind watching Twilight for the 42nd time in peace? Hmm... anyone have a cabin I can borrow for a few days? Preferably with a hot tub?

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